Do you still remember how happy you’re when you fall in love with your partner? Your day was bright, a smile on your face and you feel like you’re the happiest person on the earth. Everyone feels that way, we thought that he is the one and your relationship will last forever.
Suddenly, things happen and you’re in the middle of a breakup…
Relationships may end for a lot of reasons. It could be because you’re no longer happy with your partner, or you think he’s not good enough for you, or he never really cares about your relationship future.
Whatever the reasons, ending a relationship never been easy. Especially if you already been together for a few years. You have a lot of sweet memories been build together. Also, a lot of love has been shared. They are your partner and you love them, deep into your heart.
That why ending a relationship can be emotionally exhausting. No matter how old are you, no matter how much experiences you had, it’s never been easy to handle a breakup.
However, there is the time ending a relationship with someone you love can be the best decision in the long run. With a proper step, it may cause minimal hurt to your partner and yourself. Here are some tips on how to end a relationship with someone you love.
1- Be clear with your decision
Try to not rush into any decision, especially when you are in a bad mood. Take your time and think. There’s a lot of couples out there who ended a relationship then regret with their decision a few weeks later.
Why? Because most of their decision is based on emotion…
Don’t end a relationship if you’re not sure about it. If you have a doubt, ask yourself what is that doubt. In my opinion, before the breakup, write a list of what you no longer want to be, feel or experience in your relationship.
Visualize your list, what will happen to you after a breakup? Are you happy? Is that what you are hoping for? Your list can help you to be clear with your decision.
However, if part of you still feels that you can save the relationship then you should talk with your partner about your concerns, rather than simply put an end to the relationship.
Or if you are not sure about your relationship, this article can give you a hint: how to know when to let someone go.
2- Be prepared
Build up your courage to talk to your partner. To make things easier, think about what you’re going to say in advance. Practice in front of a mirror does help.
Remember the list that you have written before? Elaborate that point to discuss it with your partner. Be detail with your point and work out what is important to you in a relationship.
Be open and discuss directly with your partner. Don’t forget to take your partner opinion into consideration.
Many couples suffer for years and never bring up the problems to their partner. Which is what leads to a breakup. They love to assume things.
As an example:
You end a relationship because you think that is the best decision for your partner. You think that you’re blocking his career path. Or you think that you’re a burden to him. Stop that! It’s not your decision alone, you should discuss it with your partner. He knows better than you about his situation, talk with him.
3- Be respectful and honest
We never know what’s going to happen in the future. You may end up being together with your partner again. Right?
Breaking up is already painful, not for the person who’s being left behind, but also for the person who’s doing the leaving. So don’t insult them or try to hurt them.
Be honest, kind and respectful as you begin to let your partner go.
But be careful with your ‘detail’. People tend to know why they’re being dumped. You can’t simply tell them:
“You’re terrible in bed”
“You don’t have a future”
It might seem like an honest answer. But, you’re just being rude and ignorant. Instead of attacking him and blaming him for everything, focus on what you want. Changes your words, use “I” in place of “You”.
“I don’t feel like we’re compatible sexually”
“I think we have a different way viewing our future”
This is a nicer way to express your feeling. You also can keep your partner calm during the conversation. Just make sure you don’t play around and give hope to your partner.
4- Pick the right time and place
Choose your time and place that allow both of you to discuss peacefully with privacy. Pick a time by considering your partner situation. Don’t simply ask for breakup when your partner is in the middle of a big test or preparing for an important meeting.
Pick a good time for both of you. Friday night is a good example, it gives you and your soon ex-partner the whole weekend to somewhat recover from a breakup. Because there will be a period of heartbreak, sadness, and pain.
Find a less crowd location that has no special meaning for both of you. Never choose your favorite restaurant for a breakup, you may end up not going to that restaurant anymore.
But if you worried about safety, somewhere public might be the best choice.
5- Say it in person
If you’re not happy with the relationship, don’t drag the whole situation. You’re just wasting time. It is okay if you need time or your partner need time to think about it. But do it after you discuss with your partner.
Openly share what you feel, and discuss about the best solution that you should take for the relationship can be very helpful.
Do it face to face. Don’t rely on text messages if you want to end the relationship. Email, texting or calling might sound easier, but it is not the best option.
A big NO; don’t ever send your friend to deliver the news for you! It’s important to give your partner the respect that he/she deserves. Unless your partner is violence, outburst, and crazy, it may be safer for you to end the relationship at a distance.
6- Look forward
Take your times to recover from heartbreak. Surround yourself with people you love, your best friend or your families member. Fill your time with doing things that you love or do something that can make you happy.
Think about all the other things that you are free to do now. But no need to show it to your ex that you’re happy. If you do it because you want to show something to your ex, you basically still not moving on.
Just do something that you love to do, not do something because of your ex.
This is the time for you to walk out from a relationship without having any ill will with each other. Build up a positive mindset that you’re breakup for a greater good. Don’t regret your decision and move forward.
Letting go of someone you love can be very hard and painful. But it could be the best decision for a better future. It could be the best decision for your own happiness. There is nothing wrong deciding someone isn’t for you.
I hope this article was helpful to you. And I hope you will find a better person. Let us hear your comment and reactions about this article below.
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