Building better relationships is not as hard as you think. The real secrets are not about big gestures, being romantic, or being rich. It’s the small action and subtle thoughts that happen daily without being noticed. It’s about consistency, a lifetime commitment to your loved one.
I remember one of the Simon Sinek motivational talks, he said something like this. Someone didn’t fall in love with you because you remembered her birthday or bought her a flower on Valentine’s day.
She fell in love with you because when you woke up in the morning you said good morning to her before you checked your phone.
She fell in love with you because when you went to the fridge to get yourself a drink, you got her one without even asking.
She fell in love with you because when you had an amazing day at work while she came home with a terrible day at work and you didn’t say a word about your amazing day, instead you sat and listen to her awful day.
All these things look small and simple, yet it brings a huge impact on your relationship. If you don’t believe me, ask your partner.
During my work in these industries, I’ve come to observe the good habits of people that hold a relationship together over time. Good habits create a strong and healthy, better relationship, while bad habits most likely will destroy it.
It could be because of your bad habits you’re having a hard time in a relationship and make him pulls away from you.
People are not born with natural good habits in a relationship, nevertheless, it’s still can be learned and mastered if you recognized the needs. It takes time and effort to develop them.
Here are five simple habits that create better relationships:
1- Be honest & respectful
Being honest with your partner can keep the relationship strong. Barton Goldsmith Ph.D., a psychotherapist, syndicated columnist, and radio host says that,
“What honesty gives you is a great deal of comfort. Knowing you can implicitly trust your mate allows you to be your best self, and your relationship will continue to thrive because you are able to give each other the positive energy you need to navigate life’s ups and downs.”
So if you want your partner to trust you, you must be honest with each other. Respect on the other hand also can builds trust and show acceptance. Showing disrespect to your partner will slowly weaken and creates barriers in your relationship.
2- Stay connected
What I mean with stay connected is not by calling your partner every 10 minutes or texting him/her every second. It’s more likely to be present and pays attention to your partner, check up on each other.
Make a good habit by calling your partner after a long day at work to see how they’re feeling. Or just simply send a text message to make sure they made it home okay after a long journey. It’s such a small thing, but it’s can really make a big difference in your relationship. You will have a better connection and feel taken care of by one another.
You also can show attention to your partner by showing attentiveness and responsiveness when something arises. As an example, responding to your partner when they ask a question or bringing something on your way home when they asked.
According to statistics, 86 percent of happily married couples respond to their partner’s bid of attention, instead of only 36 percent of unhappy couples do the same.
3- Be supportive
Support each other is a foundation of every great relationship, why? Because our life is full of challenges. Will you or your spouse still be there for you if you lose a job? Death in a family member, or illness? Ask yourself this question. If you want your partner to be with you no matter what happens, you must be ready to support your spouse also.
In terms of support, it’s not good to always make “you” as your “main” subject. Your partner also needs to become the “main” subject. As an example, if you love hiking, you can’t push her to follow you all the time doing what you love, instead spend some of your time doing something that your partner love. It’s called give and takes.
If you are a guy, support your spouse by helping her in housekeeping, such as cleaning, shopping, and cooking. Give them some space and time to focus on their own-self. Occasionally let them hanging out with their friends or family members while you take care of your children also was good support.
4- Be a good listener
Listening is an important skill in a relationship. Unfortunately, only a few of us are taught how to be a good listener. Even though we know that listening is important, sometimes we just too busy thinking of what we want to say next instead of trying to listen to what other people saying.
The fact is everyone wants to feel heard when they talk, the same goes for your partner. Letting your partner know that you’re listening to their problems, feeling, concern, and fear can make her/him build trust in you.
A couple who are good listening to one another will have a strong happy relationship.
5- Keep the dating vibe alive.
Even after you are married, going out for a date can help to keep your relationship fresh. Be realistic, don’t aim to impress your partner. Understanding your partner’s feelings is far more important than trying to impress them.
If you are on a tight budget, go for the simple one. As an example, go for a walk or watch movies, spend the time to talk to each other, listen to your partner’s problem, go out of the city or anything. Take this opportunity to know your partner better and make him/her feel better.
Tony Robbin, one of the most popular and recognizable self-help coaches in the world once said that “The quality of your life is the quality of your relationships.” Which is true! If your husband or wife is happy, then all the people in your house will be happy. It brings positive energy and positive environments.
A successful relationship is a combination of small simple stuff that brings a huge impact to both you and your partner, it’s centered around love, kindness, friendship, and consideration.
If you have any other tips that you found useful, drop a comment below. Our community loves to hear back from you!