A serious relationship can make you feel overwhelmed, especially for young couples. With a big life change, uncertainties, commitments, and afraid of mistakes will put you in dilemma. So, to encourage you to face all the challenges, this long-term relationship advice will be quite helpful.
Some people say that young couples tend to be atrocious, emotional, and don’t think twice about their actions. Because of that, their relationship usually can’t hold long. And personally, I did not agree with that statement.
Love to experience new things, not be afraid of challenges, always enthusiastic, do not hesitate, and being able to make bold decisions is probably the most beautiful part of being young.
For me, as long as you know how to manage your relationship, it doesn’t matter whether you are a young couple or not. Age means nothing if you are matured enough to handle your relationship. But still, it needs cooperation from both sides.
How to Build a Lasting Relationship With Your Partner
Every relationship is unique and has its own ups and downs moment. People come together for many different reasons, that is why there is no one-size-fits-all answer for a relationship. However, many relationships experts and psychologists agree that a healthy relationship does share common goals and characteristics.
Practice these will help you have a fulfilling, meaningful, and long-lasting relationship. Here are the most important pieces of advice for you to practice.
1# Have a Realistic Expectation
This is required in every aspect of your relationship. Stop expecting too much from your partner. Don’t compare your real-life partner with something that you just watch on TV. Remember this, when your expectations are unreasonable, your romantic relationship becomes impossible.
I know and I agree with some people who said that you need to have your own expectation in a relationship. Because it shows you value yourself and have standards. Correct, I can totally agree with that.
But the problem is, most often, people’s expectations don’t match up to those of any average person. Naturally, we always tend to expect more. So if we’re not controlling this, it will be landing on our unrealistic territory.
One thing that we need to realize that, every person has a different mindset and goals, their term of success could be different, their term of happiness is also could be different. So, there is no way your preferences and needs could be the same as them, generally.
To find the balance, you need to meet them halfway. Try to have a realistic expectation of your partner. So that, you could at least get some of your standards, and your partner manage to follow you up to his standard.
2# Acceptance and Tolerance
Acceptance is quite related to realistic expectations. In other words, if you have realistic expectations towards your partner, it is easier for you to accept your partner wholeheartedly. Accepting your partner is an act of love and kindness. You are accepting their imperfections and flaws.
When you entering a relationship, you need to be aware that every person is an individual with different sets of brain, interests, and hobbies. So, no matter how in love you with your partner is, you can’t be on the same page with your partner all the time.
Everyone has habits or does things that we don’t like or agree with. This is normal. And as a partner, we should learn how to tolerate those things. Who knows, maybe we also have our owns ugliness that our partner really put in efforts to accept that.
A relationship is all about two imperfect people. They are accepting, tolerate, and love each other the way it is. Having these characteristics will keep your relationship balanced, strong, and healthy. It is also a key to understanding which is the main ingredient that holds a relationship longer.
3# Practice Open Communication
How do you rate your conversation with your partner right now? Did you often regret things that hurt your partner unnecessarily? Are you able to really open up in conversations? Especially for difficult and sensitive issues?
Don’t worry, you’re not alone. In fact, many of us didn’t know how to communicate effectively. We may not be comfortable voicing our needs, it could be because we’re afraid or we may just not know how to express it.
This is why good communication plays an important role and is one of the essential parts of any healthy partnership. It helps couples deal with conflict, build trust, avoid misunderstanding, confusion, and resentment.
Open communication allows you to talk freely and openly with your partner. It makes you and your partner feel safe even when you share your most private thoughts. And the most important part, both of you will talk respectfully instead of hurtful critical insults.
4# Show Your Love and Appreciation
Think back to how is your last interaction with your partner? Did you have a normal conversation like always? When is the last time you show more appreciation to your partner? Some of us are too busy with our daily schedule to even remember it.
As a matter of fact, most people stop appreciating their partners as time goes on, they start taking their significant others for granted. To prevent that happen to your relationship, take time to slow down and put extra effort to think back about your partner.
Get back to a place where you show your partner more gratitude and love. It could be at the early phase of your relationship. Recall back what your partner loves the most? Appreciation doesn’t need to be grand, it is more about little things that you can do every day.
You can just start telling the person who loves you how important they are to you. Or make an effort to show a little gratitude to them every day. Even a simple note could brighten their day. In a relationship, small efforts can definitely make a big difference.
5# Be Patient and Practice Forgiveness
A strong feeling of love can connect and keeps people together. But if you asked a strong long-term couple, terms like patience, respect, and forgiveness are often mentioned. These are the primary keys if you want a long-lasting and meaningful relationship.
Having a relationship with someone will let you know them in and out. You will learn about their strengths and flaws both the good and the bad. Like it or not, they are still your partner and you need to deal with it.
Patience is the ability to wait calmly and work towards something unhurriedly. It is undeniably good for your relationship. Patience allows you to slow down when things got frantic. It gives you space and breathing room for the communication to flow thoughtfully.
Meanwhile, forgiveness is the ability to let go of your anger, resentment, or little things that can become conflicts later on. Practice forgiveness can change your feeling, desires, and thoughts. It makes you feel less negative, it makes you let go of grudges, and you will have little desire for revenge.
Forgiveness will give you peace. Studies have shown that couples who practice forgiveness are more likely to enjoy a healthy and satisfying romantic relationship. If you want a scientific explanation about forgiveness and relationship, you can read the detailed explanation here.
6# Respect Boundaries and Privacy
A good and healthy relationship starts with mutual respect, and that includes each other personal boundaries and privacy. These two things are important because they help you communicate with what you are comfortable with.
Sometimes, a partner who’s cross your boundaries doesn’t mean to disrespect you at all. It is just that they might have been raised with different boundary expectations. What seems okay to them might not be okay to you and the other way round.
So, setting up privacy boundaries is a good option. Start by figuring out your privacy boundaries, and then talk to your partner by telling them specifics things you want to keep private. Ask your partner to do the same and be open with their request.
Sometimes, the boundaries may not make sense to you, it may sound silly, or selfish. But no matter what their boundaries, it is still their boundaries and it should be respected. If it is hard for you, try the suggestions below.
Practice active listening. Listen to their request with the goal of truly want to understand them. Don’t interrupt, because if you do, your mind will be busy thinking of what you are going to say next. Give your partner some space to express themselves.
Focus on respect. Remember you and your partner are different individuals who have different thoughts, feelings, plans, and dreams. Each of you wants to be heard and accepted as you are. If you want to read more about respect, please check this article: How To Respect Your Partner In A Relationship.
All in all, a long-term relationship required a lot of effort, commitments, and work that needs to be done. So be sure to show appreciation, acknowledgment, and gratitude to your partner. I hope this article helps you in some way.
If you have any other questions, feel free to drop a comment down below. That is all from me and I wish you a good day ahead.