What questions to ask before dating? Have you ever had this thought before you start dating someone? Well, having this kind of thought before dating is quite normal. It’s simply because we’re trying to know someone and want to decide whether we should date them or not.
But before we go through with the article, I want you to understand that this is not an article that focuses on the question you should ask your future partner. Instead, we compile a type of question that you should ask your own self.
Why? Because this question will help you understand your own situation before you go through the relationship phase.
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Entering a new relationship is a big deal, especially if you have past relationships that continually failed. To prevent the same thing happen again in your next relationship, it will be much better if you can reflect on your dating habit first.
It’s good to take a few steps back and evaluate your own self before you start developing feelings. Ask yourself these 7 questions to see whether you really should continue to develop a serious relationship with your prospective partner or not.
1# How ready are you?
A relationship is a commitment, it’s required your time, effort, and your energy. You need to make sure that your current lifestyle is ready for that commitment. If you are still in the middle of building a career, pursuing your dream, or solving your family problem, it might be good to reconsider the decision.
I’m not saying that you could not start dating because of the reasons I stated above. But it is good to wait until the storm has passed before you start inviting another crew member into your ship, which is your relationship.
Apart from that, there are a few other things that you need to prepare before you start dating. As an example, your mindset, appearance, maturity, financial stability, and more. If you think you are ready, then you can check my other article, how to start dating for success.
2# How much did you love yourself?
We hear a lot about loving other people, but how about loving ourselves? This point is so much important, we need to learn to love ourselves before we can healthily love another person. The feel of love about ourselves plays a very large role in our ability to love others.
If you don’t know where to start, try to make things as simple as you can. For example, you can love yourself by taking care of your health, maintaining a good diet, going to the gym for exercise, take care of your appearance and etc.
All of these are just simple ideas that I could relate to dating. But if you want more info about this, you can check the article from Psych Central, 22 ways to love yourself.
The idea is, if you want a good partner, you need to be good to yourself.
Did you know that your partner is a reflection of yourself? If you just live your life without any restriction or disciplined, then you will only match with people at the same level. I’m not trying to judge, but I’m just being realistic.
3# What is your life vision?
This is important because you need to have a clear vision for your future. What type of relationship life that you look forward to? What type of partner did you want to be? How did you want to live your life? What are your dreams and how you can achieve that?
You need to answer all of these questions to have a better understanding of what you want in your life. Your vision will definitely affect your relationship life. Configure all the things that are important to you will make your life dating easier because you already know what kind of partner can live with you.
Take a step back and reflect on what is your personal goal that you’re looking for in this upcoming relationship. Are you interested to start a serious relationship or do you just want a happy ending relationship?
Deciding on what you really want before you start dating someone is absolutely essential. It is to ensure that both of you are on the same page.
As an example, you want to get married as soon as you can, then you can’t get into a relationship with someone who has a different objective from you. If not, your relationship won’t work well. You can’t force your future partner to agree with all your decision or plans.
That is why it is important for you to understand your own needs first.
4# Do you have time to commit to a relationship?
Ask yourself how busy are you before you decide to start dating. If you’re the type of person who works until late at night, even on the weekend, then you need to check back your schedule first. Which one is important and which one is not?
Be clear with your lifestyle and ready to emphasize all these things to your future partner. You need to let them know about your schedule before you start making any progress. So that they can decide whether they want to be in a relationship with you or not.
But, if you’re in the middle of pursuing your dream, and working longer hours per day is necessary, then I personally think that you need to hold your intention to start dating. Chase what is important for you first, later you can decide about your relationship.
Building a new relationship takes time and effort, don’t be someone who says yes to everything, then you leave your future partner hanging because of your hectic schedule. Again (back to point no. 3) knowing what you’re looking for ahead of time is essentially important.
5# How did they take care of themselves?
It’s not about hygiene (part of it is yes), but I’m talking about overall. How do they live their life? Did they take care of their health? Exercising their body? Conscious of their diet? Feeding their brain? Or take care of their mental health?
Later on, all of these will directly affect your life, because you will spend most of your life with them as a partner. So it is important for you to know about this. I’m not suggesting you be a picky person, nobody is perfect, it is just good to be prepared.
Keep in mind, someone who doesn’t know how to take care of themselves probably did not know how to love themselves. And if they don’t love themselves, they absolutely can’t love you in a healthy and fulfilling way.
6# Did they get along with your friends and family?
Some of you might think that this point is not really important. Right? Who’s care whether your partner gets along with your friends or your family? As long as your partner doing good with you, it should be no problem.
Honestly, I’m not 100% agree with that.
Basically, your close friends and family members know you better than anyone else. Their approval carry some weight, and it can heavily impact the outcome of the relationship.
The thing is, when you have a relationship with someone, you’ll automatically have a relationship with their families. If your family did not accept your partner because of certain reasons, it is worth it for you to reconsider your decision.
7# Do they fit in with the picture you have for your future?
What is the point of dating if you did not see some sort of future with them, right? If you are just dating for fun, you will not read this kind of article. The reason why you are reading this article is because you want a serious relationship.
You are looking forward to your own future, or maybe, you did not want to repeat the same mistake.
In a conclusion, being honest and open with yourself about your dating goals is absolutely essential if you’re planning to start a new relationship. Save your time and your prospective partner time by asking yourself this question before you decide to start a new relationship.
Leave your comment below if you want to add your idea to this list. We love to hear your feedback!